Cuz nothing's going right, and everything's a mess, and no one likes to be alone.

Death. Morbid subject, right? But, I feel like this year has been invaded by death. It's weird because I've never ever had to deal with death before. My mother passing last month was the first time in my entire life someone I've known has died. However, I can list on two hands the number of people I've known that have died this year. 98% of them being under the age of 25, far too young. Because I've never had to deal with situations like these, I don't know HOW to deal with situations like these. I don't know what you're supposed to expect from people when someone you love has died, and I don't know what you're supposed to say to people who have lost someone. "Everyone deals with death differently." That's what everyone keeps telling me. It breaks my heart to know how many people are hurting without their loved ones.

You're my brown eyed girl.

Tattoo number three. I got it on July 5th, 2010, what would have been my mother's 60th birthday. The story is about a young boy, innocent and naive, yet to experience the world; and unable, or unwilling, to allow himself to mature and grow up. The letter in the boy's hand is in a very animated font - it reminds me of Sesame Street, or some other show from childhood - and it represents my mother. O is for her name, Odeter, and red because it is the color that reminds me of her the most. Her fiery personality along with her unending compassion and zest for life are encompassed by the small, colorful letter. Just like her, it is petite, but packs a punch. My best memories of my mother are from my youth, when she was fully healthy and capable of doing more active things. And the piece reminds me of that childhood relationship every one has with their parents, before we grow up and become too cool to talk to our parents. Before we grow up and become independent from our parents. It's about holding on to that time, keeping it close to your heart, and never forgetting it.


Even though I know you would have HATED this, I got this for you, Mama. I miss you every day.

Brainwashing at an early age.